Defending Myself From My Attacker
I recently attended a self-defense class. I left the class feeling empowered and strong. I learned techniques that I pray I will never have to use again, but I am now prepared, just in case. There were around 25 women in the class. Each woman desired to learn methods for keeping herself safe.
For three and a half hours, we practiced our stances and our moves. We choked each other and pinned one another to the ground. We learned techniques of protection that don't require the victim to be physically stronger than the attacker.
We learned how to fight back, and how to run away. We heard stories of other women's attacks and abuse.
For the final thirty minutes, we were offered a question-and-answer session. Our instructor asked us to share our darkest nightmares, promising to help us overcome our feelings of helplessness. Women spoke of being afraid of having their hair pulled and being pinned to the ground.
During this time, all the women described made-up scenarios and their hypothetical attackers. They drew mental pictures and used their imaginations.
Their attackers may have been wearing stocking caps or baggy sweatshirts, but their faces were unknown.
And that is when I felt the sting of difference and separation from these women.
My attacker is not hypothetical. The person I fear — the reason I may need to defend — is known to me. I know what he looks like. In fact, I know his every scar. I even know his name.
I know my potential attacker. He's repeatedly present in my home; in fact, I invited him to be there.
The reason I took a self-defense class was to protect myself from my son.
Nasko's behavior has become unpredictable. He has not yet attempted to overpower me physically, but he is growing rapidly. He absolutely could hurt me if he tried.
As we learned the defense techniques, the other women's goals were to escape and run away. If the women had the ability, they could throw a punch, or kick their attackers.
I, on the other hand, have to pack my attacker's lunch and help him wash behind his ears. I try to teach him bible stories and self-help skills. Within these responsibilities, I needed to feel safe.
So, I learned how to remove myself from a potentially dangerous situation. During the question-and-answer time, I learned ways to safely restrain Nasko, allowing his rage to pass.
I learned how to keep my attacker safe, in spite of himself.
I learned how to defend myself from my child.
[If you are an adoptive or special needs parent, I highly recommend the confidence that comes from learning self-defense techniques. Please seek out a class in your area. If you are in the Springfield IL area, I cannot recommend John Geyston's class enough. Contact him here.]